through time .. through the past experiences that i haf gone thru..

i guess i lost pretty much of the securities i used to haf.. i am constantly afraid of thngs that might be happening and whether they will come true anot, when i catch whispers of the conversations, when i feel that thngs are not right.. i feel and i noe that the balloon is inflating at a dangerous pace.. the "skin" might wear out and it might burst one dae.. till then..will i stl haf a family? mummy.. u noe wad?.. i m afraid of what u mite do constantly.. prolly to a point that i m getting paranoid.. i really du like those ppl there, taunting u.. its worse when i dun hear it frm u, worse when u deny it bt i do catch whispers of it.. as for u dad, i m more so afraid..

i seem to be losing people arnd me..things really appear to be transcient now..
i never did dared to speak of a forever.. i guess more so now.
i m tired..
will someone take me awae?